i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
