sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
