Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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