i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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