Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize