I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
