I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
