thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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