About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
