i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
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