...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
