try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
