you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
