Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
