For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
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