She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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