Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
