when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
