Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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