we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
