uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
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