I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
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