I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Randomize
