just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize