also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
the liver wants what the liver wants
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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