Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
So many bounce houses so little time
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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