That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize
