She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
What drink are we having for lunch?
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
