am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Two words: nipple clamps
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