Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
