beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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