a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
and you fell through a lawn chair
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
