So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
You're completely useless in the revolution.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Randomize
