If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
