it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
Randomize
