idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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