You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
