no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Randomize
