I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
