The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
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