I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
