If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Randomize
