I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize
