I think scott just propositioned me for sex
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
