I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
