Moan for me like Helen Keller
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
farters have to be the big spoon...
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Randomize
