When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
