i can't believe i had my finger in that
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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