Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
