what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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